Have you ever found yourself fighting for you so hard you lose track of what you're even fighting for?
I've been there, in fact, I spent most of my late teens and early twenties there. Continuously, in a place or defense and resistance, assuming that every single thing I said was somehow going to need to be stood up for. In retrospect, how annoying it must have been for anyone around me who just purely wanted to connect, play or share.
So often, we are fighting for a limitation that we perceive lies within ourselves rather than looking positively toward expansion and what truly is possible. "I can't do it because of the pain. If only you could experience the pain." or "I can't do it because in the past when I've tried I've always failed." or "I'm not enough to achieve the success I want." or my favorite "No one understands me, I'm on an island here and have to do it by myself."
When we continue to fight for what was or what still exists as a limitation, we are continuously drawing attention toward that part of us and reactivating it all over again. Every time that we say something negative about ourselves and passionately use as it as an excuse for why we can't or won't do or try something new, the cells of our body are brought back to whatever trauma or experience led us to believe that in the first place. And this elicits the same response.
The only way to shift this is to consciously make a decision toward self awareness. Ask your highest self for guidance to catch yourself in these moments and stop, listen to the words coming out of your mouth as you so intensely fight for your limitations and CHOOSE SOMETHING DIFFERENT. Make a decision to be your own biggest cheerleader rather than critic.
You know the real, authentic YOU better than anyone and he/she is not a ball of defense and resistance. He/she is underneath all of that and is wanting more than anything to be the face of you.
The real you wants to shine freely!
I want to help you shine. Here are my list of ways to notice the resistance and release it before it causes that oh so familiar unpleasant feeling of upset within you that lingers much longer than you ever imagined it could. It all starts from conscious participation in your own communication.
*Listen to your own words.* Hear what you are saying and how you are saying it. Is this authentic communication that you want to share or is your ego speaking for you?
*Choose your authenticity.* Choose the language with which you use to communicate. If you are going to be enraged about something, make sure you are really wanting to put rage out there. If you consciously choose rage, okay, that's where you are. But if you are really fearful, express that fear.
*Be vulnerable.* Vulnerability is a word that I use OFTEN. And that is because I believe being vulnerable is the key to our authenticity and breaking through our own resistance. Don't worry about what anybody (INCLUDING AND ESPECIALLY YOUR OWN EGO) thinks, wear your heart on your sleeve, feel those deep feelings and express them.
*Embrace conscious conversations.* If we continue to have the same old conversation over and over again, how can we expect expansion? Be present with your conversations and allow them to take you on a journey.