Consciously or subconsciously, the month of February reminds each of us of the sentiment known as love. Some years it brings the greatest sensation of love, connection, passion and greatness. Other years, the sentiment reminds us of heartbreak, confusion and pain. We've all experienced both sides of this story and many of the grey areas between. But why? Why does a Hallmark holiday bring up such emotion for us.
I believe the answer lives within us. I believe that so often we are looking for love in all the wrong places. Because, we are looking outside of ourselves. We are forgetting the fundamental concept that love, ANY and ALL love begins from within. Love with another cannot exist without the solid foundation of love for our own selves.
As humans, we have the ability and tendency to share our disappointment and our discontent with our significant others, families and friends. We set expectations, they are never met and we are completely dissatisfied. We want to feel love. We want to feel satisfaction. We want to feel complete. The more we look to external sources to satisfy these desires, the more we set ourselves up for failure and the further we get from what we are really longing for.
We spend a lot of time searching for and seeking outside of ourselves for what already exists within us. If you want love, greatness and satisfaction, why not start with you? After all it's you that wants to feel these things, it's you that wants to experience them fully and it's you that wants to share them. When we find a way to love ourselves, that's when we can really offer and receive within a relationship, but until then, we are creating our own Mission Impossible, by asking another to satisfy our need for love within.
So how do we make this shift toward self love?
OPEN OUR EYES: We start by making the decision to look at how we love our own self. We see ourselves without judgement and observe how we offer love to ourselves and how we don't. We consciously make a note. We observe ourselves and we tune into the way we treat our own selves.
HAVE A CONVERSATION: We get real with ourselves. We become aware of the areas that trigger us to look for external sources of love. We see the wounds, the pain, the trauma. We hold nothing against ourselves. We resolve to be more aware and to expand the positive conversations we have with ourselves.
WE ACCEPT: We profoundly accept ourselves, just as we are. We authentically exist as who we are on the inside. And we choose to love who we really are.
WE MOVE FORWARD: We let the past be the past and consciously choose to live in the now. We live in love, to the best of our ability. We let anything that anyone, especially ourselves has told us that didn't resonate fall away.
WE LOVE: We unconditionally love who we are at any given moment. We know without a doubt that we can rely on our own self love to always be there, to always be the foundation, to always be enough to hold us up. We build the foundation of love so honorably, so respectfully and so wholly that we trust and we unwaveringly love US.
THEN, WE RADIATE: We share the magnitude of love that exists within us outwardly. We do so without fear, without regard for results and without question. The brightness of our love is the source of our own happiness. And sharing the vastness of this with another is merely a gift, an exchange, a wonderful experience that becomes part of our journey. But, we never lose the foundation of love for our own selves. We know that foundation is the most important part of us.
For those who are local, we have a very special workshop coming up, The Power of Two at Soleil's Salt Cave in Exeter, NH on February 17 at 5:30pm.
Together we create a sacred space for connection, vulnerability and healing with a spouse, partner, friend, or other loved one. Connect with the energy that each of us possesses, the way we share and receive energy, and consciously exchanging energy with our partner. Tap into the healing energy of your meridian system, extraordinary vessels, tan tiens, chakras, and open eye meditation. The energy exchange between two beings is a powerful, transformational opportunity to expand your relationships.