"You don't have to kill yourself to do your work!"

It’s become a bit of a tradition in October to attend a very special event in my local community, featuring David Whyte. David is a brilliant poet and captivating speaker. He weaves his stories, poetry, essays and teachings into the most amazing tapestry. He asks the beautiful and disturbing questions, while sharing wisdom and engaging the collective consciousness.

Today, David spoke about the idea of the courageous conversation, the one you don’t want to have and part of you always knows what it is. David encouraged the attendees to share these conversations aloud in small groups and witness what we offered.

As I participated in an open conversation with a dear friend and his acquaintence, vulnerability rose to the surface for each of us. I was drawn back to the moment when David said, “You don’t have to kill yourself to do your work.” I thought about myself, my schedule, my hubby’s schedule, our two businesses, and our aspirations. I’ve known for some time that this conversation is one I’ve been avoiding, this conversation is one I’ve been in denial with.

Very often, I’ve felt like I’m on an island of responsibility and that the world rests upon my shoulders. I know that I have a tremendous about of energy and determination that spans greater than I ever imagined. However, I also know that for me to share the best, most authentic, most vulnerable parts of me, I cannot overuse my energy or my vitality. I’ve busied myself away from having this conversation. I’ve busied myself away from asking for help. I’ve busied myself away from seeing the help when it presents itself.

I’ve done this all because.. I fear being seen. I fear being in the light. I fear what may come when I stand in the center of me. It came to my awareness that I’m already being seen. I’m already in the light. I’m already here in this physical tangible form. Its time to embody my being and stand in my authenticity, to stand in my relationships, to stand in our businesses and to stand in my life.

I’m only as alone as I choose to be. I’m the only one isolating myself. I’m the only one placing responsibility on myself. I have access to help in many forms. I have access to my own happiness. I don’t have to kill myself to do my work. My work is journey of helping others to heal themselves and undoubtedly, that journey is my own healing journey. This journey offers me presence, creation, partnership, wonder, joy and truth. This is a journey of love.

THE BELL AND THE BLACKBIRD - David Whyte

The sound
of a bell
still reverberating,

or a blackbird
calling
from a corner
of a 
field.

Asking you
to wake
into this life
or inviting you
deeper
to one that waits.

Either way
takes courage,
either way wants you
to be nothing
but that self that
is no self at all,
wants you to walk
to the place
where you find
you already know
how to give
every last thing
away.

The approach
that is also
the meeting itself,
without any
meeting
at all.

That radiance
you have always
carried with you
as you walk
both alone
and completely
accompanied
in friendship
by every corner
of the world
crying
Allelujah.